The beats go on

On Feb. 25, the music industry lost one of its most successful R&B songwriters when Louisville native Stephen Garrett, aka Static, aka Static/Major, died at age 33.

Static was well-known as a member of the R&B trio Playa, but within the music industry, he was known as the mastermind behind some of this generation's greatest songs.

Though I didn't know it back then, Static literally wrote the soundtrack to my teen years. Songs like Ginuwine's "Pony" and "So Anxious," Playa's hit "Cheers 2 U" and Aaliyah's "Are You That Somebody" and "Try Again" bring back so many high school memories for me -- and they were all penned by Static.

I never met Static, but I spent this summer talking to his friends and family members who miss his smile and people in the music industry who regard him as a genius.

I share their memories of Static in the story "The Beats Go On" in this week's issue of Velocity. The story can be found online on Louisville's new Metromix site. Click here to check it out.

I Heart Louisville...

and so does photographer Leslie Lyons. Read all about Lyons and her website I Live in Louisville in my Write Out Loud column in this week's issue of Velocity.

A bittersweet week

I was on vacation last week and my husband and I traveled to Virginia to visit his family and friends. I had a chance to tour museums and a famous battleship with my mother-in-law and I finally started a book I've been toting around all summer. I ate too much and beat my high score on the Bejeweled game on my cell phone. I also went to Virginia Beach where my husband and I played in the ocean like kids and both picked up some sexy chocolate tans.

But while I was away I also heard news of the deaths of comedian and actor Bernie Mac and soul legend Isaac Hayes. A young woman at my husband's former church in Virginia died of cancer last week as well. My week was a bittersweet one as I was reminded of our mortality day after day.

But sitting around worrying about death won't keep us or our loved ones on this earth any longer. Don't worry, I'm not going to tell you to live each day as if it were your last. I'm sure most of us wouldn't spend our last day on earth at work but you have to go anyway just in case it's not your last day after all. So instead I'll just say to live and love like you mean it. Try to make each moment as good as it can get, because in the end that's really all we can do.

My Sister's Keeper

On Saturday night I was a guest speaker at My Sister's Keeper, a local weekend retreat for Louisville area middle and high school girls founded this year. The theme of the weekend was "Happy With Me" and the activities for the girls ranged from hip-hop aerobics sessions and self-defense classes to girl talk time. The weekend was designed to help build the girls' confidence but the retreat was also meant to be fun. And on Saturday night it was up to me to keep the party going.

Going along with the theme, my talk was called "How I Learned To Be Happy with Me." I spoke with the girls about how I managed to love my body and my looks despite my big hair and small boobs and how I dealt with boys who tried to pressure me into sex when I was their age. I told them I was a nerd and tried my best to convince them that they should be one too. I think it may have even worked.

Later that night, girls gave me hugs, asked for my business card and said things like, "You really inspired me," and I wanted to cry. But they have no idea how much the night inspired me.

After my talk, the girls, volunteers and I all sat in a circle and many of the girls shared heartbreaking stories of the things they're dealing with or have dealt with at home, including parents struggling with drug addictions and mental illnesses. But despite all this these girls were so kind to one another, they were so positive and they were so determined to go to college and pursue their dreams. I was blown away by their strength.

Furthermore, I was inspired by Mandi Mohammed, the founder of My Sister's Keeper. This stay-at-mom could have easily stuck to just caring for her own children, which I'm sure is taxing enough. But instead she decided to reach out to other girls in need with this program, a program I am certain changed lives this weekend.

Beach babe

Check out my latest Write Out Loud column in this week's issue of Velocity Weekly to find out why bikini season makes me do stupid things.

Distinguished professional?

I spent the past few days at my alma mater, the University of Alabama, helping out with its Multicultural Journalism Workshop, an annual summer program for high school students interested in journalism. During the weekend I also received a "Distinguished Professional" award from the organization. Frankly, I don't feel like a distinguished anything, but I felt honored.

Many of the young people I spoke with this weekend said I really encouraged them to pursue their dreams and find their voice as a writer. And as I thumbed through issues of Velocity Weekly with a few of them their eyes lit up and they squealed, "Omigod, this is so cool!" That's when I remembered that I do have a pretty awesome job and maybe I'm a "distinguished professional" after all.

To be or not to be... a mom

Check out my latest "Write Out Loud" column in Velocity Weekly. Here's an excerpt:


Being a parent, a good parent, has to be the toughest job there is. Because motherhood can be so consuming, I am terrified that after becoming a parent I will either completely lose myself and start living through my child (obviously bad for both me and the little one) -- or that I will fight so hard to maintain my identity that I will end up being negligent. I want to trust that I'll be smart and mature enough to find the proper balance, but I'm skeptical. I've been told I can raise a child and still become the world renowned writer I dream of being. But I'm not sure how I can "have it all" and still have time to shower.